Hi All, I hope you’ve had a good start to the week. I can’t believe it’s June already- May came and gone so quickly it’s sort of scary in some ways or another. I’ve been listening to NTS loads lately as well as going on Floe Camp. ‘Lullaby for Cranes’ by Item Caligo is probably one of my favourite albums: no matter how I’m feeling everything about it takes to a place where I’m in my own world and there is something really calm, peaceful and beautiful about this album I can’t quite put it into words.
I suppose this post is unrelated to work as I’ve been quite honest about my anxiety lately as I feel that I shouldn’t really hide it any longer. I finally deleted Instagram off my phone as it’s been cranking up my anxiety levels lately; it was worst the other day and my gut instinct was the delete the damn thing. And you know what? I instantly felt so much better, as in, the physical symptoms went away instantly and my mind was at peace again. I noticed that whenever I was on it I would start comparing myself, my work, my house to others. I would think what changes I can make towards myself whilst looking at these edited and filtered images. Don’t get me wrong, Instagram is a powerful tool to share your work, your family life, your dream decor inspirations etc. However, that wasn’t positive for me at all. I become so wrapped up in other people’s lives that I stopped paying attention to myself. The self-realisation after the mini panic attack made me re-evaluate my way of thinking, how I see myself and how I want to always please others. For a very long time I’ve always been the type of person to make others happy, be extremely critical of myself and constantly beating myself down about the smallest things. It’s very easy to be sucked into the online world, I mean, I thought of all people it wouldn’t happen to me and it did. I look back at my timeline and I genuinely have fond memories of my photos such as holiday photos, birthday’s etc.
Instead, it’s getting far too repetitive for me as I’m constantly seeing the same polished photos of people’s lives I don’t even know- it’s just so transient. Someone had said to me that we should be enjoying life itself rather than living through social media and I couldn’t agree more than that. We’re getting to the point now where our personal and social lives are blurring into the digital world by being judged and analysed which is completely unhealthy in my opinion.
I’ve lost my passionate in it and my own creative path by being on it so I’m taking a step back and giving it a well deserved break for a while. Goodbye Instagram, you were good while it lasted.
Take care of yourselves everyone and look after one another.